Sunday, 7 July 2013

What ever happened to being Thick?

I left School many years back and The system had just about given up getting through to me by this time.
When I left...

I could not get my head around times tables.

I could not spell for shit.

I could no more co-ordinate myself to catch a ball than I could fly the bleeding Space Shuttle.

Grammar, spelling and punctuation were an absolute mystery.

Computing was something that the speccy cunts in the upper ranking classes got to play on.
The assumption was my Class would either try to fuck or eat a Computer unless there was a window to chuck it from.

Handwriting, Forget it. So you could read an English essay of mine alright if you had several weeks and an enigma machine to your disposal.

Butter it any way you like but I was a fucking Spanner and I knew it LMAO!

However these days there is a myriad of conditions that can be used to describe my uselessness.

The tip of the iceberg as coveralls like Dyslexia, Every fucker and their Dog is dyslexic these days.

I am not claiming you dear reader are not, but hardy anyone was dyslexic in the 1980s.

I may well be, although I cannot be arsed to look into it.

All is not lost though, it turns out there is also a myriad of ways to cover my shortcomings these days.

I am brought to you by the power of spellcheck and quite a bit of other software tonight, I don't need to write a damn thing with a pen either so you can read it.

Oh and computers, Even us thickys can use them now :D

They tell you what day it is , you don't need to code them or know your 7x tables to use them.

So it turns out the speccy cunts have...
A/ been quite clever.
B/ made a rod for their own back by making it more inclusive to chuckleheads like me.

Personally, I'm betting they are kicking themselves.

Its ok though I still cant Kick a Ball for toffee.


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