I am afraid tonight's blog is not one for the more genteel Flowers amongst my readership.
I could apologise profusely but Fuck that, I am Pissy, some Arsehole has lit the string on my Tampon good and proper and I am Chewing on the bastard now.
For someone who has been fitted with a potty mouth from birth, I do believe it or not censor my thoughts, and I DO hold back a Little.
MOSTLY!
Tonight though It is going to be both barrels, and a veritable Nailbomb of thoughts.
This is the result of some people who never fail to Disappoint me with their attitudes to fellow man , countered with some who are I feel the stem root of all that is wrong with the world.
We all know the circle of Commerce right?
Ok I will refresh you if you do, and if you genuinely don't Its time to pull up a chair.
At the top of the food chain we have big Business.
Big Business runs the Show, We like to believe its the Government elected by us but this is just a ruse.
Big Business lines the Pockets of Government, Gets laws tweaked in their favour and Bungs the Government money to shut the fuck up and turn a Blind eye to the shenanigans they play.
Ever Played Monopoly? Its that same shit , About an hour in... Some clever Cunt manages to buy everything up to the degree where whenever you roll those Dice you get royally Fucked wherever you land.
They then laugh as you remortgage everything to pay for their Hotels on Mayfair.
The difference from the game is... with real life, not everyone starts off with the same amount of money, or has a stash of Get out of Jail Free cards.
To play real life Monopoly against the like of Mr Tescos for example is one hell of a game you are highly unlikely to win.
You could Start up a little independent Supermarket by all means but since Mr Tescos is loaded he can afford to loss lead you out of the market, suffocate the competition, and then Buy your little shop, set it up as a Tescos extra.
You may think I don't own a corner shop how does this affect me, and you for that matter? Scroll up . Remember... Big Business runs the show and gets laws tweaked In its favour.
Take a Big company, pretty much most big company will do. There will be a hierarchy from the Owner ,The Board of Directors/Shareholders, Area Managers, Departmental Managers..Shopfloor...to the Guy who Mops out the Bogs.
The Owner wants more profit. So He/she calls a meeting with the Board.
"I want more for less" "OK Sir" they say, They look at their lives think Mmmm this is a good gig don't want to affect my world in any adverse, way lets pass this shit down and get back to the Masons.
So they send a Stern E Mail down to their Henchmen the Demented Departmentals.
"Rah rah rah more for less, stir some shit up make more money or else"
Departmentals look at their world, decide ."I Like my world, I don't want to change my world for the worse...Who can I cut back on... who's arse can I kick to make things add up?"
Looks down... "Hmmm Micro-management time!"
"OI SHOPFLOOR" More for less or else!
So in the name of helping the economy in recent years ...
Tribunals have been made pretty much unfinanceable for a good chunk of people on the ground floor.
The laws have also been Tweaked so it is easier for an employer to manage people out as opposed to give redundancy where it is due.
The voice of the common person has been pretty much wiped out, besides there is plenty of desperate people from all round the world to run the Gig on Fear alone.
I am sure if I turned up in this country gaffertaped to the underside of a Lorry escaping an ethnic clensing, Minimum Wage and ritual bullying would still be shit but tolerable in comparison.
Problem is if Our third world escapee and all his mates are willing to put up with shit, Bossman thinks hey lets make this the norm, and if they don't like it we can fuck em off and get some more Kosovans in.
So Shit becomes the norm.
Now don't get me wrong, I have no Beef with anybody who decided to up sticks and leg it from the other side of the planet for a better life.
However having the powers that be use it as an excuse to push me harder for less, and in a warped way feel grateful on days I manage not to be worse off, Frankly its Cuntish!
Industrial action has been all but contractually outlawed for many on the ground floor. So there is no way of Biting back.
Besides, If you do we will just get one of the many unemployed to take your place.
Ah the Unemployed , The government will tell you this shit is all their fault, This is BOLLOCKS! They certainly add to the situation, but why are they unemployed in the first place Hmmm?
Some are Bred to be Stupid, Fed Media Shite given barely enough education to stand on their hind legs and sent off to do grunt labour without the brain process to question it. They will need to compete hard for this grunt labour and keep hold of it.
So some wont bother.
Revolution is looking unlikely too, what with the Government and Media dripfeeding the info all funded by big Business.
In short without a lot of people saying "fuck this" and storming parliament we are screwed.
Only there is laws against that too funnily enough.
So what can you or I do to change this? Answers on a postcard please...
Be Lucky, Fuck the System
M
Tuesday 4 February 2014
Wednesday 11 September 2013
Neighbourhood Watch and Fixing my street.
I had a bit of an Online disagreement last night.
Someone asked the question would I shop someone for having no Car Tax?
In short, not really same as I wouldn't skank anyone for doing the odd private job.
The Bottom Line is Im not too impressed with HM Government, and I think I can spend my Money in a more responsible manner than they seem to manage.
They get way too much of my hard earned as is (and By fuck do I earn it) and they don't tap the big Kids enough for my liking either.
ANPR equipped Police the DVLA and Local authorities sort out VED dodgers anyway. So I begrudgingly Pay my Road Rent (Should go on Petrol anyway... that way everyone pays a fair share)
But anyway back on to reporting tax dodgers etc which brings me neatly round to Fix my Street.
I wont share the link but Google it, It makes interesting reading...
The Gist of the site is it is a place to report all sorts of local problems , things like Fly tipping, dangerous paving slabs broken Lamp posts, that short of Shizzle.
Being a Sad bastard I enjoy reading through these things occasionally. Part taking an interest in my local area and part laughing at the Pathetic Trivia that people feel the need to report.
Unfortunately these sorts of sites tend to attract a certain sort of Person.
We don't have the background why but these people serial post. I have one in my local area, you will have one in yours Guaranteed.
Maybe they are bored , Maybe they think it will make the world a better place , and just maybe their loved one ran off with a Council worker.
They will patrol they will make notes they will take pictures.
I will give you some made up examples, just to give you the flavour.
There has been an old sofa outside number 34 for almost a week now, It is making the street look untidy.
A paving slab is slighty wobbly on Juniper Street , I reported this in Yesterday and am yet to see any Progress.
Does someone need to Die before you respond?????
There is 2 untaxed vehicles in the Front Garden of Number 67, It Is making the Road Look like a Scrapyard.
Mr Patel at No 37 is leaving his Wheelie Bin Out a day early blocking the pavement and attracting Vermin. THIS IS A HEALTH HAZARD!
Mrs Jones Bush is Unkempt, and Twigs are dropping Out, I don't know why I bother reporting these things, the council never do anything.!!!!!!!!!??!
A Serial Poster will bang all these reports out in the course of a Week, and here is my theory in posters like this.
I will personify the serial Poster and on this occasion we will give her a name , my serial poster is Jeanette.
Reading through my local area I have a mental Picture of Jeanette.
She has many Cats cos she is lonely, and she probably drove a Volvo 343 until her eyesight started to fail.
She makes cakes for the WI that everybody secretly dreads receiving cos they have cat Hairs in them.
Jeanette is a Widow, Albert Gassed himself in the Volvo to get away from her.
Albert spent his later years cowering in the relative haven in his allotment shed with the odd snifter from a Bottle of Brandy and His Pipe for Company. (Jeanette wouldn't let him smoke it in the House ...or Outside the House... or in the Street for that matter as it made the street look like a place of ill repute besides smoking will kill you yadda yadda).
On the night that Albert took his life, in an cruel and unnoticed twist of irony as he tapped out His Pipe for the last time... Garden hose poked through the crack in the window.
He mumbled his last words as he flicked the ignition and sat back "Bloody woman always needs to be right" Yup Smoking would be the death of Albert for sure!
So without Albert around to moan about and disparage every day, Jeanette goes down to Lidls for Catfood, Notepad in hand.
...and after Maud (Previously) at the WIs Grandson showed her the internet, she takes her notepad and diligently reports any happenings via Mauds Grandson.
Mauds Grandson Then types this in begrudgingly for her, secretly hoping the cats conspire and smother her in her sleep.
Maud is Jeanettes only Friend, and has no idea that Jeanette was the ringleader in the Outing of Maud, and this resulted in the ultimate expulsion of Maud from the WI...for daring to use a A Square cake tin of Illegal proportions in the annual WI bakeoff.
I may be wrong mind...
Laters M
Someone asked the question would I shop someone for having no Car Tax?
In short, not really same as I wouldn't skank anyone for doing the odd private job.
The Bottom Line is Im not too impressed with HM Government, and I think I can spend my Money in a more responsible manner than they seem to manage.
They get way too much of my hard earned as is (and By fuck do I earn it) and they don't tap the big Kids enough for my liking either.
ANPR equipped Police the DVLA and Local authorities sort out VED dodgers anyway. So I begrudgingly Pay my Road Rent (Should go on Petrol anyway... that way everyone pays a fair share)
But anyway back on to reporting tax dodgers etc which brings me neatly round to Fix my Street.
I wont share the link but Google it, It makes interesting reading...
The Gist of the site is it is a place to report all sorts of local problems , things like Fly tipping, dangerous paving slabs broken Lamp posts, that short of Shizzle.
Being a Sad bastard I enjoy reading through these things occasionally. Part taking an interest in my local area and part laughing at the Pathetic Trivia that people feel the need to report.
Unfortunately these sorts of sites tend to attract a certain sort of Person.
We don't have the background why but these people serial post. I have one in my local area, you will have one in yours Guaranteed.
Maybe they are bored , Maybe they think it will make the world a better place , and just maybe their loved one ran off with a Council worker.
They will patrol they will make notes they will take pictures.
I will give you some made up examples, just to give you the flavour.
There has been an old sofa outside number 34 for almost a week now, It is making the street look untidy.
A paving slab is slighty wobbly on Juniper Street , I reported this in Yesterday and am yet to see any Progress.
Does someone need to Die before you respond?????
There is 2 untaxed vehicles in the Front Garden of Number 67, It Is making the Road Look like a Scrapyard.
Mr Patel at No 37 is leaving his Wheelie Bin Out a day early blocking the pavement and attracting Vermin. THIS IS A HEALTH HAZARD!
Mrs Jones Bush is Unkempt, and Twigs are dropping Out, I don't know why I bother reporting these things, the council never do anything.!!!!!!!!!??!
A Serial Poster will bang all these reports out in the course of a Week, and here is my theory in posters like this.
I will personify the serial Poster and on this occasion we will give her a name , my serial poster is Jeanette.
Reading through my local area I have a mental Picture of Jeanette.
She has many Cats cos she is lonely, and she probably drove a Volvo 343 until her eyesight started to fail.
She makes cakes for the WI that everybody secretly dreads receiving cos they have cat Hairs in them.
Jeanette is a Widow, Albert Gassed himself in the Volvo to get away from her.
Albert spent his later years cowering in the relative haven in his allotment shed with the odd snifter from a Bottle of Brandy and His Pipe for Company. (Jeanette wouldn't let him smoke it in the House ...or Outside the House... or in the Street for that matter as it made the street look like a place of ill repute besides smoking will kill you yadda yadda).
On the night that Albert took his life, in an cruel and unnoticed twist of irony as he tapped out His Pipe for the last time... Garden hose poked through the crack in the window.
He mumbled his last words as he flicked the ignition and sat back "Bloody woman always needs to be right" Yup Smoking would be the death of Albert for sure!
So without Albert around to moan about and disparage every day, Jeanette goes down to Lidls for Catfood, Notepad in hand.
...and after Maud (Previously) at the WIs Grandson showed her the internet, she takes her notepad and diligently reports any happenings via Mauds Grandson.
Mauds Grandson Then types this in begrudgingly for her, secretly hoping the cats conspire and smother her in her sleep.
Maud is Jeanettes only Friend, and has no idea that Jeanette was the ringleader in the Outing of Maud, and this resulted in the ultimate expulsion of Maud from the WI...for daring to use a A Square cake tin of Illegal proportions in the annual WI bakeoff.
I may be wrong mind...
Laters M
Monday 5 August 2013
Is there an age limit on Cool?
Well if there is I am Uberfucked.
So what's brought this on? Oh a couple of events in recent years.
Example one, Going to see a band I was into back in the day, This case It was a band that had reformed called Neds Atomic Dustbin.
They were a Hip and happening Indie band in the late 80s early 90s and then the disappeared.
The last time I went to a Gig like this was back in the day so being an old fart of 40 something I thought , yup why not when they reformed.
I remembered all the young sweating skinny Grebo kids jumping about in the pit, and the Rosetints in my mind said WHY the FUCK NOT.
Sure enough If I closed my eyes the band still had it and if you squinted they still sort of had that visual impact of a few angry young men playing Loud music.
and then I focused a bit more. Like me, everyone in that room had grown up got crows feet and spread out a bit.
This made me feel relieved and a bit sad all in a heartbeat.
I felt a bit like the cure to eternal youth had suddenly reversed itself in a split second.
I saw fat sweaty balding people in band teeshirts Moshing G E N T L Y...
What did I expect? I don't really know, It was great to hear the band, really, don't get me wrong.
and I don't know why I was not prepared with what I saw but I found it depressing.
Now what I had planned.
Took me a while to get over that one.
I took a look at my self image(bad move)
I then realised Im still wearing pretty much the same shit I have worn since I was 16, Sure the leather Jacket has been retired (Although it will never be got rid of It still smells of patchouli oil, stale sweat, Beer and other past frivolities, I could find that jacket with a Blindfold) but I still am at my happiest in a Black band teeshirt * (see below notes on the rules of band teeshirts) Black Jeans or Combats and Converse or Boots.
I can be swayed into other clothing but its not as comfy on me and feels wrong.
Im guessing I must be the 80s equivalent of the Old Dudes I used to see in Demob Suits when I was a nipper.
Yet I see nothing wrong with that.
Going on from that, There are some Old Dudes that will never be uncool.
Ed Roth for example, always and forever cool.
A Myriad of Rockstars Ozzy, I Cant believe its not John Lydon, and Iggy. Old wrinkly and addled but cooler than Pingu's Pee pee.
So second example, I am car nut, Rods, Customs, Classics...the odd VW.
I tend to drive what I like and like what I drive...and befucked to anyone who don't get it. I build for my own amusement.
Marmite is always on the menu lets say.
Anyway I have made a foray into a certain marque of car recently after many years or VWdom.
Now the actual cars are great but unlike the VW crowd who were pretty easy going on the whole, Im struggling to suss out what these people will make of my interpretation of they type of car.
I met a Club member this Sunday and I made a point of introducing myself, Now don't get me wrong She was a nice Lady, but she smacked of someone trying too damn hard ay the Zany thing.
Oh look at me and my funny car how mental Am I , Im barking I am.
This struck me as sad and desperate.
I have mates and they don't try to be Odd or quirky they just are like that.
I find this endearing there is no trying and LOOK at me , Its 100% them no faking.
The problem with the above person , is this is the third member I have met from said club and its all the same.
Strikes me as Needy and Kills an Cool they have.
Its like hanging out with your Mother in law and only slightly less embarrassing than hanging out the back of your Mother in law (at a guess, Im not from Norfolk)
I don't mean to be like this but its suddenly Whoah what the fuck is wrong with you Matey..
I am not under any delusions I am on the pulse any more, I am not down with the Kids (Probably for the Best if Operation Yew tree is to be taken into account)
Im not that sure I have ever been.
So My synopsis in short as I am sure you are getting bored now...
Cool has No age, It is subjective, There are Old dudes that are cooler than I will ever be, and there are some sad young fucks.
but what the fuck do I know anyway?
*So then a footnote about Band teeshirts ...These Must and I mean MUST be purchased at a Gig and NEVER from Primark etc.
They are earned in the pit and then fighting your way to the merch stand afterwards.
I Like the Ramones, I like the Pistols I would never wear either as I have never seen them Live.
I have seen CARDIACS lots of times , I have lots of Cardiacs tees. I have seen PWEI a few times I have PWEI Tees...I also own a Neds Teeshirt ...I don't wear that Much.
These are the rules.
Laterzzz
M
So what's brought this on? Oh a couple of events in recent years.
Example one, Going to see a band I was into back in the day, This case It was a band that had reformed called Neds Atomic Dustbin.
They were a Hip and happening Indie band in the late 80s early 90s and then the disappeared.
The last time I went to a Gig like this was back in the day so being an old fart of 40 something I thought , yup why not when they reformed.
I remembered all the young sweating skinny Grebo kids jumping about in the pit, and the Rosetints in my mind said WHY the FUCK NOT.
Sure enough If I closed my eyes the band still had it and if you squinted they still sort of had that visual impact of a few angry young men playing Loud music.
and then I focused a bit more. Like me, everyone in that room had grown up got crows feet and spread out a bit.
This made me feel relieved and a bit sad all in a heartbeat.
I felt a bit like the cure to eternal youth had suddenly reversed itself in a split second.
I saw fat sweaty balding people in band teeshirts Moshing G E N T L Y...
What did I expect? I don't really know, It was great to hear the band, really, don't get me wrong.
and I don't know why I was not prepared with what I saw but I found it depressing.
Now what I had planned.
Took me a while to get over that one.
I took a look at my self image(bad move)
I then realised Im still wearing pretty much the same shit I have worn since I was 16, Sure the leather Jacket has been retired (Although it will never be got rid of It still smells of patchouli oil, stale sweat, Beer and other past frivolities, I could find that jacket with a Blindfold) but I still am at my happiest in a Black band teeshirt * (see below notes on the rules of band teeshirts) Black Jeans or Combats and Converse or Boots.
I can be swayed into other clothing but its not as comfy on me and feels wrong.
Im guessing I must be the 80s equivalent of the Old Dudes I used to see in Demob Suits when I was a nipper.
Yet I see nothing wrong with that.
Going on from that, There are some Old Dudes that will never be uncool.
Ed Roth for example, always and forever cool.
A Myriad of Rockstars Ozzy, I Cant believe its not John Lydon, and Iggy. Old wrinkly and addled but cooler than Pingu's Pee pee.
So second example, I am car nut, Rods, Customs, Classics...the odd VW.
I tend to drive what I like and like what I drive...and befucked to anyone who don't get it. I build for my own amusement.
Marmite is always on the menu lets say.
Anyway I have made a foray into a certain marque of car recently after many years or VWdom.
Now the actual cars are great but unlike the VW crowd who were pretty easy going on the whole, Im struggling to suss out what these people will make of my interpretation of they type of car.
I met a Club member this Sunday and I made a point of introducing myself, Now don't get me wrong She was a nice Lady, but she smacked of someone trying too damn hard ay the Zany thing.
Oh look at me and my funny car how mental Am I , Im barking I am.
This struck me as sad and desperate.
I have mates and they don't try to be Odd or quirky they just are like that.
I find this endearing there is no trying and LOOK at me , Its 100% them no faking.
The problem with the above person , is this is the third member I have met from said club and its all the same.
Strikes me as Needy and Kills an Cool they have.
Its like hanging out with your Mother in law and only slightly less embarrassing than hanging out the back of your Mother in law (at a guess, Im not from Norfolk)
I don't mean to be like this but its suddenly Whoah what the fuck is wrong with you Matey..
I am not under any delusions I am on the pulse any more, I am not down with the Kids (Probably for the Best if Operation Yew tree is to be taken into account)
Im not that sure I have ever been.
So My synopsis in short as I am sure you are getting bored now...
Cool has No age, It is subjective, There are Old dudes that are cooler than I will ever be, and there are some sad young fucks.
but what the fuck do I know anyway?
*So then a footnote about Band teeshirts ...These Must and I mean MUST be purchased at a Gig and NEVER from Primark etc.
They are earned in the pit and then fighting your way to the merch stand afterwards.
I Like the Ramones, I like the Pistols I would never wear either as I have never seen them Live.
I have seen CARDIACS lots of times , I have lots of Cardiacs tees. I have seen PWEI a few times I have PWEI Tees...I also own a Neds Teeshirt ...I don't wear that Much.
These are the rules.
Laterzzz
M
Tuesday 30 July 2013
Censorship Its a Load of ***** ****
Interesting times we are living in, It seems every year we end with less freedom.
...and the mental thing is it gets sold to us as a good thing.
We have this wonderful internet thing, and it is a great tool, Its a learning tool, its a communication tool, its something we can all enjoy with freedom, uncensored.
I can say words like Cunt and fuck without pretty much any recourse, and as you have noticed to read this you need to press a button that says yes I am an adult, and yes there may well be rude words in and out of Context.
PISSFLAPS!
Recently in the media, there was talk of a police investigation with arrests over something said over the internet.
Now I'm not going to go into details, but things were said people got upset and the Po Po were called.
Now I'm guessing that person felt shocked enough to call the Police and that's fair enough.
Does the whole lot need Nannying as a result though?
There is also talk of Nonces, Noncing on the internet, now I will be the first to admit that ain't good.
However making everyone tell their internet provided that you may intend on viewing stuff that although perfectly legal ( OBVIOUSLY Not including Illegal stuff like Peado, beastiality cruelty or anything really wrong etc) might make the Vicar frown.
So the reasoning behind this censorship? pretty much its down to protecting Kids, so that they cannot see stuff that will affect them (Well that's their excuse).
Am I missing something here?
Is there not the capability on each and every computer to add a parental lock and filter, and for Fucks sake, ITS THE INTERNET it is not a replacement babysitter for Diddums .
A responsible parent, Should ...
A/ Be keeping at least a quiet Eye on what Diddums is Looking at.
B/ Should not be expecting the world to pretend the Vicar is round for tee just in case Diddums gets nosy.
Content locks work, As an adult trying to fox one for shits and Giggles on a College course (Shared computer in a Classroom, I was a mature student ...More immature though) They can be a pain in the Arse.
They work in other words.
Sweary filters at work, can work too.
Try typing in Scunthorpe and you will get S****horpe in some cases.
So on a local level the tech is there and I am guessing easy to install.
Why do I think the government want to really do this?
The internet is unregulated It is the last Freedom, and Politicians don't like us to have Freedom (They Like the Old School Tie to rule all areas, Preferably tied Tightly to the wardrobe door while they Thrap away...did I just type that? you betya)
They don't like us having access to something we can talk freely on any given subject, We may even talk freely about what we think of them without recourse.
In recent years we have seen and been subject to gagging orders, Twitter content has lead to prosecution.
We can all think it, we can all mutter it around the coffee machine at work, but woe betide we write it on the Internet.
Rumour has it every time we communicate via an electronic device we are monitored on a passive level, there are trigger words, One is a B word, it has 4 letters, and it goes bang for instance.
Say that word or others and electronic ears prick up at somewhere like Goonhilly and someone starts listening in / Looking at your content.
Paranoia? Dunno the people who know ain't exactly going to tell us if it is true are they?
Now to a degree I am sorta cool with this, If it stops nutbars flying flying Planes into buildings then that is OK.
But what is that tech gets abused? Signing up to view adult content I feel is the thin end of the wedge, Signing up to that will give them a reason enough to monitor you
What is considered Adult content? Way too many variables to define it
.
That ain't Cool.
You must also remember that the Government is in Bed with the Church (Allegedly, They MAY also have a bit of a rep for unsavoury stuff in some cases, So they May also benefit from keeping our mouths shut)
It's bad That there are kiddy fiddling Sites, It is bad there is Abuse and cruelty sites. AGREED!!!??!
Mentioning Pervs and Abusers in the same Paragraph as the Church is purely coincidental...Honest.
but what would you rather, Have Sickos somewhere the Authorities cab sniff them out? Or drive them further underground where they will struggle?
No Brainer really.
Bottom line.
Im an ADULT, I can decide what's suitable for me to see and read, and if I stumble across something I don't like I just Shrug, remember im an ADULT, Click back and look elsewhere.
The Internet is a Diverse and big old place place, Long may that continue.
Peace out
M
...and the mental thing is it gets sold to us as a good thing.
We have this wonderful internet thing, and it is a great tool, Its a learning tool, its a communication tool, its something we can all enjoy with freedom, uncensored.
I can say words like Cunt and fuck without pretty much any recourse, and as you have noticed to read this you need to press a button that says yes I am an adult, and yes there may well be rude words in and out of Context.
PISSFLAPS!
Recently in the media, there was talk of a police investigation with arrests over something said over the internet.
Now I'm not going to go into details, but things were said people got upset and the Po Po were called.
Now I'm guessing that person felt shocked enough to call the Police and that's fair enough.
Does the whole lot need Nannying as a result though?
There is also talk of Nonces, Noncing on the internet, now I will be the first to admit that ain't good.
However making everyone tell their internet provided that you may intend on viewing stuff that although perfectly legal ( OBVIOUSLY Not including Illegal stuff like Peado, beastiality cruelty or anything really wrong etc) might make the Vicar frown.
So the reasoning behind this censorship? pretty much its down to protecting Kids, so that they cannot see stuff that will affect them (Well that's their excuse).
Am I missing something here?
Is there not the capability on each and every computer to add a parental lock and filter, and for Fucks sake, ITS THE INTERNET it is not a replacement babysitter for Diddums .
A responsible parent, Should ...
A/ Be keeping at least a quiet Eye on what Diddums is Looking at.
B/ Should not be expecting the world to pretend the Vicar is round for tee just in case Diddums gets nosy.
Content locks work, As an adult trying to fox one for shits and Giggles on a College course (Shared computer in a Classroom, I was a mature student ...More immature though) They can be a pain in the Arse.
They work in other words.
Sweary filters at work, can work too.
Try typing in Scunthorpe and you will get S****horpe in some cases.
So on a local level the tech is there and I am guessing easy to install.
Why do I think the government want to really do this?
The internet is unregulated It is the last Freedom, and Politicians don't like us to have Freedom (They Like the Old School Tie to rule all areas, Preferably tied Tightly to the wardrobe door while they Thrap away...did I just type that? you betya)
They don't like us having access to something we can talk freely on any given subject, We may even talk freely about what we think of them without recourse.
In recent years we have seen and been subject to gagging orders, Twitter content has lead to prosecution.
We can all think it, we can all mutter it around the coffee machine at work, but woe betide we write it on the Internet.
Rumour has it every time we communicate via an electronic device we are monitored on a passive level, there are trigger words, One is a B word, it has 4 letters, and it goes bang for instance.
Say that word or others and electronic ears prick up at somewhere like Goonhilly and someone starts listening in / Looking at your content.
Paranoia? Dunno the people who know ain't exactly going to tell us if it is true are they?
Now to a degree I am sorta cool with this, If it stops nutbars flying flying Planes into buildings then that is OK.
But what is that tech gets abused? Signing up to view adult content I feel is the thin end of the wedge, Signing up to that will give them a reason enough to monitor you
What is considered Adult content? Way too many variables to define it
.
That ain't Cool.
You must also remember that the Government is in Bed with the Church (Allegedly, They MAY also have a bit of a rep for unsavoury stuff in some cases, So they May also benefit from keeping our mouths shut)
It's bad That there are kiddy fiddling Sites, It is bad there is Abuse and cruelty sites. AGREED!!!??!
Mentioning Pervs and Abusers in the same Paragraph as the Church is purely coincidental...Honest.
but what would you rather, Have Sickos somewhere the Authorities cab sniff them out? Or drive them further underground where they will struggle?
No Brainer really.
Bottom line.
Im an ADULT, I can decide what's suitable for me to see and read, and if I stumble across something I don't like I just Shrug, remember im an ADULT, Click back and look elsewhere.
The Internet is a Diverse and big old place place, Long may that continue.
Peace out
M
Wednesday 17 July 2013
The Circus commeth to town, and the Clowns are running the show.
Just a Short one tonight Its too Bloody hot but I need to spill
Ever wake up one morning and think Hmm what am I in for today?
Ever think with this many Clowns around me surely I have accidentally run away with a Circus?
Yup welcome to the world of Mark
Some of the stuff I see beggars belief
Today for example I was repairing and painting the front of a reception desk.
I had a paint roller in my hand, I was painting with it, I had caution wet paint signs everywhere.
I had 3 people try to lean against said desk while I did it.
Each time I Said MIND THE WET PAINT to them.
The replies in order were "Errr?" "You what!" and "Where?"
You have not Lived until you have seen the dimness of the general public at large.
Obviously not you Dear Reader, but some of the people wasting oxygen on this Planet need to be reported on to be believed.
If you see a lift with Keep out Barriers around it, and Cuttons covered with Out Of Order signs.
Do You?
A/ Think perhaps I will take the Stairs?
B/ Push the barrier to one side, Step into the lift, Pull off the out of order sign and Press Buttons Franticly just incase it was all a lie?
Lots of People think B is the answer.
Whats the worst that could happen eh!
As an aside If ever you get trapped in a lift never shout and swear at the person attempting to rescue you.
We tend to fuck off for a Cuppa till you calm down if you do that.
Talking of Lifts its not just the Public that lacks the Busfare sometimes.
Sometimes you get an attack of common sense from within the upper ranks.
Just the other day I was requested to repair a non functioning disabled Toilet.
I was about to interject the requestee however he was In an "I know best mood Get it done pronto" Mood so I just buckled down and did it.
I saw him later and Told him Said Disabled Loo was now in Tip top working Order.
and...
All that needed to happen now was the Lift engineer to order the parts to fix the decommissioned lift leading to said Disabled Toilet.
Three weeks later...Still no Lift.
So Disabled people have Heart if you do manage to negotiate 2 Flights of Stairs crawling via your teeth if needed the Toilet at the top of them works.
OK?
The Mind Boggles
Laters
M
Ever wake up one morning and think Hmm what am I in for today?
Ever think with this many Clowns around me surely I have accidentally run away with a Circus?
Yup welcome to the world of Mark
Some of the stuff I see beggars belief
Today for example I was repairing and painting the front of a reception desk.
I had a paint roller in my hand, I was painting with it, I had caution wet paint signs everywhere.
I had 3 people try to lean against said desk while I did it.
Each time I Said MIND THE WET PAINT to them.
The replies in order were "Errr?" "You what!" and "Where?"
You have not Lived until you have seen the dimness of the general public at large.
Obviously not you Dear Reader, but some of the people wasting oxygen on this Planet need to be reported on to be believed.
If you see a lift with Keep out Barriers around it, and Cuttons covered with Out Of Order signs.
Do You?
A/ Think perhaps I will take the Stairs?
B/ Push the barrier to one side, Step into the lift, Pull off the out of order sign and Press Buttons Franticly just incase it was all a lie?
Lots of People think B is the answer.
Whats the worst that could happen eh!
As an aside If ever you get trapped in a lift never shout and swear at the person attempting to rescue you.
We tend to fuck off for a Cuppa till you calm down if you do that.
Talking of Lifts its not just the Public that lacks the Busfare sometimes.
Sometimes you get an attack of common sense from within the upper ranks.
Just the other day I was requested to repair a non functioning disabled Toilet.
I was about to interject the requestee however he was In an "I know best mood Get it done pronto" Mood so I just buckled down and did it.
I saw him later and Told him Said Disabled Loo was now in Tip top working Order.
and...
All that needed to happen now was the Lift engineer to order the parts to fix the decommissioned lift leading to said Disabled Toilet.
Three weeks later...Still no Lift.
So Disabled people have Heart if you do manage to negotiate 2 Flights of Stairs crawling via your teeth if needed the Toilet at the top of them works.
OK?
The Mind Boggles
Laters
M
Thursday 11 July 2013
There are some Filthy Fuckers about...and the real reason public facilities are put out of order.
I have had better days...As some of you may Know or not. I do Buildings Maintenance these days.
Trust me I may no longer be a Cleaner, but I do still end up getting involved in the less savoury end of the General Publics activities.
Today for example I was unblocking a Disabled Toilet some helpful Punter decided to flush Nappies or what ever the fuck you call the adult ones .
Plunger said NO.
Couldn't access the rodding eye without risking a backup in the pipes blowing up on me.
Plunger said NO.
Couldn't access the rodding eye without risking a backup in the pipes blowing up on me.
Simple Physics said If I didn't empty the pipe first the pressure would mean I got very messy as soon as I undid the Bolts.
Cutting back to the bone, there would be no way of avoiding the Tsunami of Faecal matter hitting me, and very possible in the face.
So I picked the 'safe' Option and got busy with the wetvac.
Now due to the unique way the company is funded this thing is knackered, with a loose pipe etc.
So I picked the 'safe' Option and got busy with the wetvac.
Now due to the unique way the company is funded this thing is knackered, with a loose pipe etc.
I have a Cleaner at the ready in case it goes badly wrong, and for a bit of moral support really in these situations.
So there I am sucking away when the pipe decides to come loose.
Top end of the pipe is lodged down the pan and not going anywhere.
So I let go of this end and jam the other end of the pipe back in its hole.
This causes a surge making the other end of the pipe to rear up out of the Pan like a Cobra.
and the liquid pressure to simultaneously drop in the now lunging towards me pipe.
You can guess the rest.
Not a moment I care to repeat ever again.
So there I am sucking away when the pipe decides to come loose.
Top end of the pipe is lodged down the pan and not going anywhere.
So I let go of this end and jam the other end of the pipe back in its hole.
This causes a surge making the other end of the pipe to rear up out of the Pan like a Cobra.
and the liquid pressure to simultaneously drop in the now lunging towards me pipe.
You can guess the rest.
Not a moment I care to repeat ever again.
I got covered in Wet Sewage purely cos someone decided to be a Thoughtless Cunt.
I would say 80% of the plumbing jobs I get involved with are due to someone Blocking Toilets up either from Ignorance or on Purpose.
Would you feed your Toilet at home any of the above items and then try to Flush them.
An entire Toilet roll, either rolled up still or just unravelled and jammed to the top.
A Coke Can.
Drugs paraphernalia and Sharps.
A Whiskey Bottle.
Or any number of misc unflushable items you dropped down there accidentally and decided you no longer required them.
Thought not.
So anyway earlier this week I had the need to close some other Toilets for repair due to one of the above Blockages.
How did the Public deal while I was taking one for team?
Did they look for alternative facilities? Well sort of...If you mean by Getting shouty at me before Pissing and curling one out in the Quieter corners of said Centre them yes they did.
Going back to the House analogy, If I visited these peoples houses to find their Toilet was not working would I be justified in Curling one out in the Kitchen Sink?
Or would I just hold out make my excuses and carefully go towards the next available facilities.
The thing is the Public just don't get this, If you were to ask any of the facilities team why something is out of order we tend to spare you the details.
We will put up signs with nice ambiguous things on them like . "This Facility is Closed for Essential Maintenance" or Closed for cleaning, and If pressed by the Public then we might even tell you there has been a Flood /Incident etc and Its closed over health and safety Grounds.
Why? Well you don't really want to know it closed cos some scuzzy fucker decided to Block the Toilet with Paper, Shit on the Seat and then smear it up the walls (It happens more than you would imagine... there are some right dirty bastards about)
If something is broken its cos someone before you Broke it.
If something is dirty its cos someone made it dirty.
I have seen Cleaners get Bollockings over this loads of times.
They Clean and check the Toilets once an Hour There is no reason they would walk away without doing this or providing you with somewhere sanitised and something to wipe your arse on, No seriously they DO!
but if they Clean it and someone decides to make a 'Bold statement' in there just afterwards.
You walk in and see it , before storming off to the nearest Member of Staff to complain.
Or if you are really enraged you demand to see the Boss man.
So they clean up some pretty inhuman shit, and then they get Bollocked about it.
Not really on is it?
Please have a think before you go into one.
By all means tell us there is a Problem, Please do. It helps us sort stuff out if we know about it, but bear this in mind.
99 times out of 100 Its not the Cleaner/Maintenance Guys being Lazy (and trust me we really do put up with some real nasty things to clear up and repair) Its some scuzzy fucker being scuzzy.
Trust me I do not spend my day Blocking Toilets,Wiping shit about and Breaking stuff,and neither do the Cleaners. Cos funnily enough, I am too busy unblocking the things and fixing stuff to make myself more work to do.
Maybe I need some laminated Signs to put up saying "Closed while I clean up after some inconsiderate piece of Shit"
anyway if anyone was missing the Blog of the Bog I hope you have got the fix fer now.
I seem to have reverted to default.
Peace out and neither a Scuzzy Fucker or Complainer be.
Laterzzz
M
Wednesday 10 July 2013
The higher the Tree the less it hurts when you fall from it.& What your Boss dont want you to Know...
Well it makes sense really, fall from the bottom branch it will hurt like fuck, fall from the top one even if it hurts it wont hurt for long...
This post is not about falling from trees but it's a tie in (If a crap one... hey its been a Hot day and I have been somewhat fried at work today) so it will do to start the theme for tonight.
Bankers, Politicians...
What do they and many others at the top of the tree have in common?
Well lets see...
They are at the top of the tree, and argue as much as you like they get paid a good chunk of money for essentially working for us (Apparently in our best interests)
They will argue (They fucking love arguing) that they deserve top Dollar as they are the best in their field.
They all have Jobs with lots of big responsibilities that is a given.
I would guess you have some big responsibilities too.
Maybe you have a Mortgage, Rent, Mouths to feed and Clothe like most of us?
There is a however a hell of a difference between being at the top and bottom of the tree.
If a cleaner for example fucks up badly, chances are its a little something in the paypacket that week.
A P45 and a don't come back.
At the bottom of the Chain you don't really get that much of a Golden Handshake , It really is more of a Golden Arsekick .
Cleaning companies whether they admit it or not employ misfits very much on purpose (I can say this I was one) Without trying to upset anyone they all tend on the whole to consist of Migrants, Students, People with criminal records, People with not much in the way of qualifications, and surprise surprise the desperate.
Work out for yourself what category you think I was...
Cutting it back to the bone, as someone who has interviewed people for cleaning in the past myself.
(I have been both Monkey and Organ owner remember)
I would start with an informal chat. Just to suss out what made them tick. I would ask them If they had cleaned before (99% of the time they said yes and I would say 30% actually came across as they really had)
Check the documents, Take a Photocopy of them, fill out the form and Congratulations you start Monday.
You could easily spend ages looking to find out background checks but chances are you will find a fly in that ointment.
I gave up all that shit and based my interview purely on first impression. (Would I talk with this person on a social level? If yes they got the Gig)
So If they do turn up Monday and chances are they don't anyway (Fast turnover you see, Its nearly always a stopgap), Chuck em a Uniform, a mop, and hope to fuck they do a goodish job, and not make you look like a Cunt... or turn out to be a serial killer when Personnel start digging.
(The number of times I ended up being a personal reference for complete strangers just to get someone in and past Personnel, but I digress)
So why do Cleaning firms employ Misfits? On the Most part they will take being dicked about for Bottom Dollar.
Sorry to say this but it is the truth.
Bosses love this , I am Not a Cunt like that mind, That's why I stopped being the Organ owner.
I am a Mostly a People person and I fucking hate seeing other people being dicked over by the Man .
In fact this is one of the main reasons I went from Cleaning Area Supervisor (Big area about 200 Cleaners) back to being a Cleaner... I have a conscience.
but anyway at the Bottom of the chain, if you need to cutback people get Managed out. They get Fired 9 times out of 10 over trumped up petty shit.
The official line, You are bad at your job (It happens sometimes, but not that often, See above)
The unofficial line, a Manager would get told to single someone out and chew their arse till they gave up.
This happens Loads.
They get the 3 strikes and Out system as is required by law.
When they come in for the final Bollocking they will either go mental at you
(Gross Misconduct BINGO that's exactly what they want!) or are worn down so much they say fuck it and leave.
If you are reading this as someone going through the Mincer from a Boss, Do me a favour work harder and better than before, Give that person no possible reason to fire you, Just SUCK ARSE until they give up, BOSSES FUCKING HATE THIS it drives them Batshit as it makes you a really difficult Target.
Anyway as I was saying at the bottom of the chain when its bye-bye time you will get the square route of fuck all when your time is up.
This sucks and needs to change.
But what of those at the top of the pile?
Banker/MP fucks up (say the economy for example) Big handshake and a Bung More than enough to tide them over for the rest of their natural lives in a comfy manner.
Now hang on here.
Due to the responsibility and the board shoulders they need to have, they get a big Paypacket
This I can deal with , Fair enough If you are good at something that's is highly important then you deserve that Bonus, you deserve that Big house, The Nice cars and an Island in the Caribbean.
Fair play you are looking after all our shit and we are in safe hands.
Until the day you fuck up badly that is.
and when you do Fuck up it hurts everyone, People will lose their Jobs, some will get the Cleaners retirement Package I mentioned earlier to save costs I:e ...FUCK ALL!
These people will get into debt, lose all they have worked hard for, Car, House, Savings etc.
This has been many peoples reality.
So exactly why do these people deserve a Payoff?
Why does one person get gravel and broken bottles ,the other a parachute and a nice fluffy quilt to land on?
Both human beings as far as I am aware?
So
Fucked it I know?
All I do know it is wrong diddly wrong
I don't purport to have the answers, however I hope I have got you asking questions.
Anyway
Laters
M
This post is not about falling from trees but it's a tie in (If a crap one... hey its been a Hot day and I have been somewhat fried at work today) so it will do to start the theme for tonight.
Bankers, Politicians...
What do they and many others at the top of the tree have in common?
Well lets see...
They are at the top of the tree, and argue as much as you like they get paid a good chunk of money for essentially working for us (Apparently in our best interests)
They will argue (They fucking love arguing) that they deserve top Dollar as they are the best in their field.
They all have Jobs with lots of big responsibilities that is a given.
I would guess you have some big responsibilities too.
Maybe you have a Mortgage, Rent, Mouths to feed and Clothe like most of us?
There is a however a hell of a difference between being at the top and bottom of the tree.
If a cleaner for example fucks up badly, chances are its a little something in the paypacket that week.
A P45 and a don't come back.
At the bottom of the Chain you don't really get that much of a Golden Handshake , It really is more of a Golden Arsekick .
Cleaning companies whether they admit it or not employ misfits very much on purpose (I can say this I was one) Without trying to upset anyone they all tend on the whole to consist of Migrants, Students, People with criminal records, People with not much in the way of qualifications, and surprise surprise the desperate.
Work out for yourself what category you think I was...
Cutting it back to the bone, as someone who has interviewed people for cleaning in the past myself.
(I have been both Monkey and Organ owner remember)
I would start with an informal chat. Just to suss out what made them tick. I would ask them If they had cleaned before (99% of the time they said yes and I would say 30% actually came across as they really had)
Check the documents, Take a Photocopy of them, fill out the form and Congratulations you start Monday.
You could easily spend ages looking to find out background checks but chances are you will find a fly in that ointment.
I gave up all that shit and based my interview purely on first impression. (Would I talk with this person on a social level? If yes they got the Gig)
So If they do turn up Monday and chances are they don't anyway (Fast turnover you see, Its nearly always a stopgap), Chuck em a Uniform, a mop, and hope to fuck they do a goodish job, and not make you look like a Cunt... or turn out to be a serial killer when Personnel start digging.
(The number of times I ended up being a personal reference for complete strangers just to get someone in and past Personnel, but I digress)
So why do Cleaning firms employ Misfits? On the Most part they will take being dicked about for Bottom Dollar.
Sorry to say this but it is the truth.
Bosses love this , I am Not a Cunt like that mind, That's why I stopped being the Organ owner.
I am a Mostly a People person and I fucking hate seeing other people being dicked over by the Man .
In fact this is one of the main reasons I went from Cleaning Area Supervisor (Big area about 200 Cleaners) back to being a Cleaner... I have a conscience.
but anyway at the Bottom of the chain, if you need to cutback people get Managed out. They get Fired 9 times out of 10 over trumped up petty shit.
The official line, You are bad at your job (It happens sometimes, but not that often, See above)
The unofficial line, a Manager would get told to single someone out and chew their arse till they gave up.
This happens Loads.
They get the 3 strikes and Out system as is required by law.
When they come in for the final Bollocking they will either go mental at you
(Gross Misconduct BINGO that's exactly what they want!) or are worn down so much they say fuck it and leave.
If you are reading this as someone going through the Mincer from a Boss, Do me a favour work harder and better than before, Give that person no possible reason to fire you, Just SUCK ARSE until they give up, BOSSES FUCKING HATE THIS it drives them Batshit as it makes you a really difficult Target.
Anyway as I was saying at the bottom of the chain when its bye-bye time you will get the square route of fuck all when your time is up.
This sucks and needs to change.
But what of those at the top of the pile?
Banker/MP fucks up (say the economy for example) Big handshake and a Bung More than enough to tide them over for the rest of their natural lives in a comfy manner.
Now hang on here.
Due to the responsibility and the board shoulders they need to have, they get a big Paypacket
This I can deal with , Fair enough If you are good at something that's is highly important then you deserve that Bonus, you deserve that Big house, The Nice cars and an Island in the Caribbean.
Fair play you are looking after all our shit and we are in safe hands.
Until the day you fuck up badly that is.
and when you do Fuck up it hurts everyone, People will lose their Jobs, some will get the Cleaners retirement Package I mentioned earlier to save costs I:e ...FUCK ALL!
These people will get into debt, lose all they have worked hard for, Car, House, Savings etc.
This has been many peoples reality.
So exactly why do these people deserve a Payoff?
Why does one person get gravel and broken bottles ,the other a parachute and a nice fluffy quilt to land on?
Both human beings as far as I am aware?
So
Fucked it I know?
All I do know it is wrong diddly wrong
I don't purport to have the answers, however I hope I have got you asking questions.
Anyway
Laters
M
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